I believe the first time that I heard talking about resiliency was during COVID-19 lockdown. People started to say that resiliency is fundamental for our mental health, and as you know, lockdown was really hard for us as our lives as we knew them changed from one day to the other drastically. We could not go out as we used to, had to wear masks, had to work from home, and many other changes that we had to face suddenly. As it was a challenging time, and being resilient helps you to work through challenges and problems as well as improve your life even when things are not going well, resiliency became part of our lives.
I started to adapt this term more and more in my life. Not only with COVID-19, but also when my daughter was born, and from the birth to breastfeeding, everything turned out the opposite way I had dreamed about. With a baby whose life depends on you, you have to gain strength to carry on, you cannot just give up.
For my daughter, I would like her to be resilient because she will face disappointments, challenges and difficulties in her life, and as much as I wish, I cannot always protect my child. Resilient children try to solve a difficult problem when they encounter one. When something bad happens, they have the ability to bounce back, and are ready to face the next challenge. When they make a mistake, they learn from it and grow. Resilient children are strong, optimistic and hopeful. You as a parent can provide your child with the necessary tools to navigate the adversities that they will encounter. Here are some ways on how to help your child becoming resilient.
Supportive Relationships
Supportive relationships are crucial for a child's resilience as they provide a nurturing and secure environment in which children can develop and grow. Strong and positive connections with various individuals, such as parents, caregivers, family members, friends, and teachers, create a web of support that contributes to a child's overall well-being.
When parents demonstrate love, understanding, and acceptance, children feel safe and secure, knowing they have a reliable source of emotional support. Parents who actively listen, communicate effectively, and validate their child's feelings create a bond of trust and encourage open dialogue. For example, a child who is going through a challenging time with a friend may confide in their parent, seeking guidance and reassurance. The parent's supportive response, offering understanding and empathy, helps the child develop resilience by knowing they are not alone in their struggles.
Family members also contribute to a child's support network. Siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins provide additional sources of emotional support and guidance. For instance, a child who is experiencing difficulties in school may find solace and encouragement from an older sibling who has gone through a similar situation. Family gatherings and traditions further foster a sense of belonging and create a supportive atmosphere where children feel valued and accepted for who they are.
Friendships provide children with opportunities to connect, share experiences, and build mutual support. A close friend can be a listening ear, a source of comfort, and a companion through both triumphs and challenges. Teachers who create a nurturing and inclusive classroom environment foster supportive relationships with their students.
Supportive relationships offer emotional support, guidance, and a sense of belonging. They create a foundation for children to develop resilience by fostering an environment where they can openly express their emotions, seek guidance during challenging times, and receive validation for their experiences.
Social and Emotional Skills
Social and emotional skills play a vital role in a child's resilience as they equip them with the necessary tools to navigate life's challenges, manage their emotions, build healthy relationships, and make sound decisions. These skills encompass a range of abilities that support a child's emotional well-being and contribute to their overall social competence.
Self-awareness is a foundational social and emotional skill that involves recognising and understanding one's own emotions, thoughts, strengths, and weaknesses. When children develop self-awareness, they become better equipped to identify their emotions and understand the factors that influence their behaviour.
Self-regulation refers to a child's ability to manage and control their emotions, thoughts, and behaviours. Children who possess self-regulation skills can effectively navigate challenging situations without becoming overwhelmed or impulsive. For instance, a child who encounters a setback in their academic performance can use self-regulation techniques like deep breathing or positive self-talk to calm themselves, refocus, and persevere through the difficulty.
Empathy is a crucial social skill that involves understanding and sharing the feelings of others. It enables children to connect with and support their peers, demonstrating kindness, compassion, and consideration. By empathising with others, children develop strong interpersonal relationships and contribute to a supportive and inclusive social environment.
Problem-solving skills empower children to find effective solutions to challenges they encounter. When children are equipped with problem-solving skills, they can approach obstacles with a proactive mindset, break down complex problems into manageable steps, and explore different strategies to overcome them. For instance, a child who is struggling with a difficult math problem can apply problem-solving techniques such as breaking the problem into smaller parts or seeking guidance from a teacher or classmate.
Effective communication is essential for building and maintaining healthy relationships. Children who develop effective communication skills can express their thoughts, feelings, and needs clearly and respectfully. This skill enables children to navigate conflicts, negotiate, and collaborate with others.
By cultivating social and emotional skills such as self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, problem-solving, and effective communication, children gain valuable tools to handle stress, build positive relationships, and navigate life's challenges with resilience. These skills contribute to their emotional well-being, help them adapt to different social settings, and enable them to make positive choices for their own growth and development.
Positive Belief in Abilities
Cultivating a positive belief in their own abilities is crucial for children to develop resilience and face challenges with confidence. When children have a strong sense of self-belief, they are more likely to embrace a growth mindset, persevere through difficulties, and maintain a belief that they can overcome obstacles.
Encouraging children to believe in their strengths and abilities involves recognising and celebrating their accomplishments, talents, and efforts. Parents, caregivers, and educators can provide specific and genuine praise for the child's achievements, acknowledging their hard work and progress.
It is also important to create an environment that nurtures and supports a growth mindset in children. A growth mindset emphasises the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through effort, practice, and learning from mistakes. Parents and educators can encourage children to view challenges as opportunities for growth and learning rather than as roadblocks. For instance, when a child faces a difficult academic assignment, they can be reminded that mistakes and setbacks are part of the learning process, and with persistence and effort, they can improve and succeed.
Setting realistic goals and providing opportunities for children to experience success is another way to foster a positive belief in their abilities. By setting achievable goals and celebrating milestones along the way, children build confidence in their capacity to tackle new challenges.
Supporting children in exploring a variety of interests and activities also helps build their self-belief. When children have opportunities to engage in different pursuits, they can discover their passions and strengths. Encouraging them to take on new challenges and try new experiences broadens their perspective and allows them to recognise their abilities in different domains.
Furthermore, providing a supportive and nurturing environment that values effort, perseverance, and resilience helps children internalise a positive belief in their abilities. When children receive consistent support and encouragement from trusted adults, they develop a sense of self-efficacy and belief in their potential. This support can include offering guidance, providing constructive feedback, and being a source of encouragement during difficult times.
By fostering a positive belief in their abilities, children develop resilience by approaching challenges with confidence and persistence. They learn to view setbacks as opportunities for growth and development, maintaining a belief that they can overcome obstacles through effort, learning, and utilising their strengths.
Healthy Coping Strategies
Teaching children healthy coping strategies is essential for their emotional well-being and resilience. These strategies equip children with effective tools to manage stress, regulate their emotions, and adapt to challenging situations.
Deep breathing exercises are a simple yet powerful coping strategy that children can utilise in various situations. Teaching children to take slow, deep breaths can help them calm their minds and bodies, reducing feelings of stress and anxiety.
Physical activity is another healthy coping mechanism that promotes resilience. Engaging in physical exercise releases endorphins, which boost mood and reduce stress. Encouraging children to participate in activities such as sports, dancing, or simply going for a walk can help them release pent-up energy, clear their minds, and manage their emotions effectively.
Creative outlets provide children with a means to express their emotions and thoughts in a constructive way. Artistic activities like drawing, painting, or sculpting allow children to channel their feelings and promote self-expression.
Journaling is a valuable coping strategy that allows children to reflect on their experiences and emotions. Writing in a journal can provide a safe and private space for children to express their thoughts, concerns, and aspirations. By encouraging regular journaling, parents and educators can help children gain clarity, self-awareness, and a sense of release. Journaling can be particularly beneficial during times of transition or challenging situations.
It is important to teach children a variety of coping strategies and encourage them to explore what works best for them individually. By providing children with a toolkit of healthy coping mechanisms, parents, caregivers, and educators empower them to effectively manage stress, regulate their emotions, and adapt to difficult situations.
Structured and Safe Environments
Providing children with structured and safe environments is crucial for their overall development and resilience. A structured environment offers a predictable and consistent framework that helps children feel secure, fosters a sense of stability, and enables them to focus on their growth and well-being. Here are some key aspects of structured and safe environments for children:
Consistent routines play a vital role in creating a structured environment. Having regular schedules for activities such as meals, bedtime, homework, and playtime provides children with a sense of stability and predictability. Routines help children develop a sense of control and mastery over their daily lives, which contributes to their emotional well-being and resilience.
Clear boundaries are essential for maintaining a safe and structured environment. Establishing and communicating clear expectations and rules helps children understand behavioural boundaries and social norms. When children know what is expected of them, they feel secure and have a clear framework for their actions and interactions.
Safe physical surroundings are an integral part of a structured and safe environment for children. Creating a physically safe space ensures that children can explore and engage in activities without unnecessary risks or dangers. Childproofing homes, providing age-appropriate toys and equipment, and monitoring the environment for potential hazards are important steps in creating a safe physical space.
A structured and safe environment supports children's resilience by offering stability, predictability, and security. It allows children to focus on their development, explore their potential, and navigate challenges with confidence.
Access to Resources and Opportunities
Access to resources and opportunities is a critical factor in promoting resilience and fostering the overall well-being of children. When children have access to essential resources and a range of opportunities, such as education, healthcare, nutrition, and extracurricular activities, it empowers them to develop their skills, and expand their horizons.
Education is a fundamental resource that equips children with knowledge, critical thinking skills, and the tools they need to succeed academically and in life. Access to quality education enables children to develop their potential, build a strong foundation of knowledge, and acquire essential life skills. It promotes resilience by instilling a love for learning, fostering intellectual curiosity, and empowering children to pursue their goals and aspirations.
Access to healthcare services, regular check-ups, and preventive care ensures children's physical and mental well-being. Timely medical interventions, vaccinations, and access to healthcare professionals enable early detection and management of health issues, promoting resilience by supporting children's overall health and enabling them to thrive.
Nutrition plays a vital role in supporting children's physical and cognitive development. Access to nutritious meals and a balanced diet provides children with the energy, nutrients, and building blocks necessary for growth, brain development, and overall well-being. Adequate nutrition contributes to resilience by enhancing children's concentration, cognitive abilities, and immune system, enabling them to face challenges and learn effectively.
Extracurricular activities offer children opportunities for growth, learning, and exploration beyond the classroom. Access to a range of extracurricular activities, such as sports, arts, music, or clubs, fosters resilience by promoting social skills, teamwork, creativity, and personal development. These activities provide children with a platform to discover their passions, develop new talents, and build a sense of achievement and self-confidence.
Access to resources and opportunities creates a sense of hope, optimism, and future orientation in children. It empowers them to explore their potential, pursue their interests, and envision a positive future for themselves.
Problem-Solving and Decision-Making Skills
Teaching children problem-solving and decision-making skills is crucial for fostering their resilience and empowering them to navigate challenges independently. These skills enable children to identify problems, think critically, evaluate options, and make informed choices. By developing problem-solving and decision-making abilities, children gain a sense of agency, self-confidence, and adaptability when facing difficulties.
Identifying problems: Encouraging children to recognise and define problems is the first step in problem-solving. This involves helping children identify issues, challenges, or obstacles they encounter.
Analysing options: Teaching children how to analyse and evaluate different options helps them develop critical thinking skills. Children can explore various strategies, alternatives, or approaches to address the identified problem. For instance, a child who is struggling with time management may consider options such as creating a schedule, prioritising tasks, or seeking assistance from a teacher or parent.
Considering consequences: Developing decision-making skills involves teaching children to consider the potential consequences of different choices. Children learn to weigh the pros and cons, anticipate outcomes, and evaluate potential risks and benefits.
Evaluating and selecting solutions: Teaching children to evaluate and select the most appropriate solution or course of action empowers them to make informed choices. Children learn to assess the feasibility, effectiveness, and alignment with their values and goals.
Implementing and reflecting: Encouraging children to implement their chosen solution and reflect on the outcomes helps reinforce their problem-solving and decision-making skills. Children learn from their experiences, adapting their approaches if needed, and building resilience by persevering through challenges.
Teaching problem-solving and decision-making skills empowers children to become independent, as well as gain a sense of agency, confidence, and adaptability.
It is important to note that these pillars are interconnected and mutually reinforcing. By nurturing and supporting these pillars, parents, caregivers, and communities can play a crucial role in promoting resilience in children.
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